Saturday, January 30, 2016

Bravery is a pique turn

Often times in our society, we have a rather limited understanding of concepts like "courage" and "bravery" typically linking them to aggressive "macho" behavior (which is why we get so much bravado and posturing from foolish braggarts like this, who are so fearless, that the can't even handle lukewarm questions from a Fox Blonde.) Sometimes we can forget the sheer bravery in simply living your life openly and freely. As such I decided to give you an example of a young man who is doing just that simply by continuing to dance despite not fitting into society's preconceived notions of "appropriate" gender-assigned roles or "courageous men." Just a quick reminder that often, simply buckling the status quo and doing what you're passionate about takes a lot of guts. I say, right on, Sean Varner!

Cynical Proverbs 1:30

"All's fair in love and war."
Which is why i keep having Cupid perform drone strikes on the ones i love. (Uh-oh. I better stop now before some dimwitted senator gets An Idea and "Operation  Cupid" is drafted as a foreign policy proposal.)

Monday, January 18, 2016

AKA: The day America pretends its achieved racial equality

Why yes it is Martin Luther King day again. A day where we, as a nation revere the great civil rights leader (well, at least since 2000 for some states who had be dragged kicking and screaming into the modern age.) Well, at least we revere the watered-down, defanged, milquetoast version of MLKjr at any rate (see also post-Parkinsons Muhammad Ali, who, by sheer coincidence I'm sure, became a more "beloved" figure as older age and disease caused him to become less outspoken.) As the civil rights struggle continues with Black Lives Matter and other activist groups (whose acts of civil protest prove that they are trouble-making rabble-rousers, unlike that well-behaved MLK who...oh wait.), I think this is a good time to highlight an article that gives a more comprehensive look at King's legacy and activism. In particular, this piece dispels notion that non-violent protest is and must be stripped of urgency, assertiveness and confrontation. As the article states:

In its time, King’s use of nonviolent resistance generated a nearly unending stream of controversy. And in this era of Black Lives Matter, it is critical to remember that, far more than a serving as a peacemaker, King was an advocate of disruption.
Too often (yes on "both sides of the aisle"), King has been inaccurately classified as a mild-mannered "wimp", a "good black" because our desire for revisionist history on racial matters has led the impact of his work rather misunderstood (Surprise! He wasn't always such a "beloved" figure):

Looking back from the safe remove of history, it can be easy to imagine that landmark social and political causes of the past— whether they involved ending slavery, securing the franchise for women, or establishing standards of workplace safety — were popular and widely celebrated. But the truth is that these issues generated tremendous acrimony. In promoting them, activists had to make the difficult decision to invite division and hostility before they achieved their most impressive results.
King’s Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) often drew criticism not only from defenders of segregation, but also would-be allies who believed the protests the organization helped lead were unduly abrasive and ultimately counter-productive. In this way, King bears much in common with the #BlackLivesMatter activists who are currently being attacked for perceived impatience and incivility in promoting their cause.

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Cynical Proverbs 1:16

"God has a plan for you"
Unfortunately for some people, the Holy one's "plan" had a page missing (God: The "Insert Brain Here" instructions are missing. Oh well, I'm sure that was just one of those extra pieces anyway), and was translated to Japanese and French halfway through. So keep that on mind when some peopke seemed poorly put together and some of the parts seemed to be put in wrong (which is any "part" that results in a Duggar or a Palin being impregnated.)

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Obama's SOTU speech: The part where he tells bigots to grow the Hell up.

This a particularly nice little moment about the repulsive pig-headed childish ugliness and abuse that has infected this country this political season from Obama's State of the Union address that that I read via Wonkette highlighting of it (You can feel, the President's exasperation, as he apparently didn't know babysitter would be a requisite of his job):

That’s why we need to reject any politics that targets people because of race or religion. This isn’t a matter of political correctness. It’s a matter of understanding what makes us strong. The world respects us not just for our arsenal; it respects us for our diversity and our openness and the way we respect every faith. His Holiness, Hope Francis, told this body from the very spot I stand tonight that “to imitate the hatred and violence of tyrants and murderers is the best way to take their place.” When politicians insult Muslims, when a mosque is vandalized, or a kid bullied, that doesn’t make us safer. That’s not telling it like it is. It’s just wrong. It diminishes us in the eyes of the world. It makes it harder to achieve our goals. And it betrays who we are as a country.

Shorter Obama: "You want to make America 'great' again? Then stop being society's unwashed asshole, and stop licking at the taint of the Dirty Asshole Coalition."
Actually, I wish Obama HAD said that plainly and precisely. With such "straight talk", I think even Trump' embarrassing Klan of easily-bamboozled poo-flingers would have understood the basic principle.

And as I've said before, no, such action is not "telling it like it is" (unless "it is" is: "I'm an ignorant lout incapable of basic human decency, and as such I have nothing of value to contribute to the national discussion except a visual demonstration to the Imodium AD people why they should make a pill for verbal diarrhea too."

Sunday, January 10, 2016

We interrupt this blog for an important announcement.

I know I should have mentioned this earlier, but society wanted me to focus on such trivial matters like "working" and "earning a living" and "taking care of responsibility" to the point where it's interfering in my time of doing the important work of making smart-ass mockery of aphorisms. As a result, I have decided to make the "Cynical Proverbs" segment a bi-weekly feature. If time permits, i might find something to fill in the spaces of the "missing" week. So you'll gave to wait until at least Saturday until to hear basterizations of life-affurming platitudes.

Saturday, January 2, 2016

Cynical Proverbs 1:02

"You'll catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar."
For this one, i decided to turn to America's wisest high philosopher, Kelly Bundy ("Oh I know what that is! That's, like, a doctor that studies a woman's philosophy tubes." Sigh. Please stay focused, Kelly):

"Yes but if you pull their wings off they'll eat whatever you give them."
(And who the Hell wants to attract flies, anyway?)