Saturday, September 24, 2016

Saturday, September 3, 2016

Cynical Proverbs 9:03

If you lie down with dogs, you'll to get up with fleas
Of course it seems more prudent of us to simply give that mangy ol' dog a bath (or alternatively to go get the dog "fixed") 😆

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Da Mic Drop: IknowRIGHT (with a special guest appearance by...)

Da Mic Drop is a regular segment, where we look at people who make such a pointed "standing-ovation-worthy" commentary in regards to a person or issue that it has to be highlighted. 

I might say more about the Colin Kaepernick flag "non-troversy" (what? But I thought we were still supposed to be "scandalized" by Anthony's weiner?) But because this accusation always comes up whenever  someone is not properly wrapping themselves in the flag I thought it might be helpful to have a refresher course on how "Patriotism" actually works, courtesy of this post by Wonkette message board contributor, "IknowRIGHT" (hey look at him and/or her live up to his/her name!):

Things that make you patriotic.
1. Being kind to each other
2. Respecting others beliefs or non beliefs
3. Helping each other
4. Loving each other
5. Supporting troops both during AND AFTER the war.
6. Paying your damn taxes. You want the benefits of living here, You have to pay up. I'm told life isn't fair, we're told that frequently so why should it "be fair" how much you pay in taxes? Luke 12:48 "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." You want to say we are a Christian nation, then start acting like it.

Things that DON'T make you patriotic
1. Flag Pins on your lapel when running for office
2. Saying you support the troops, but cut funding for their food stamps housing, education funds, mental & health services after coming home from war.
3. Being a Christian.
4. Putting your hand on your heart during the national anthem
5. Standing during the national anthem.
6. Reciting the pledge of allegiance
7. Being white
8. Being a Republican, Democrat, Libertarian, Green Party, Hippy, Trump Supporter or what ever, no one party owns the rights to patriotism.
9. Draping yourself in the flag.
10. Telling others what they say is Anti American because YOU don't agree with it.
11. Thinking the Constitution begins and ends with the 2nd Amendment, and for forgetting that the 2nd Amendment STARTS "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State,"
12. Saying immigrants aren't welcome. Unless you are a Native American you come from Immigrants too.

Edited to Add (9-3-2016): With many schools suffering budget crisis,  it's apparently up to two-bit bloggers and hapless comment sections to play substitute Civics class teacher. So class (Bobby, stop throwing spitballs at Sarah and pay attention!) let's have guest lecturer poboy7 school you on how those gosh darn "rights" work in regards to Kaepernick:

Let's get some things straight.
Colin Kaepernick is an American citizen.
He has Constitutional rights.
He has rights Jefferson referred to as "natural born rights."
He is not a second class citizen, no matter if you agree with and disagree with his stance.
He does not need for you to give him permission.
He does not need for you to tell him it's okay.
He has every right to give his opinion about this or any other issue he wants to.
Just because he signed a labor contract does not mean he loses any of his Constitutional rights, including the rights to free speech.
That labor contract bought his services not him, because he is not a slave.
Buying his labor does not prevent him from exercising his Constitutional or human rights.
If you do not agree with any of these, I have one question for you.
What country do you think you live in?
Here in this country, the land of the free and home of the brave, we have Constitutional rights that can not be infringed.
Who disagrees with this?

That guest speaker is so clumsy, doing an epic mic drop right in the middle of the lecture.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Da Mic Drop: Special Wiener Edition (No need to snap a pic of that "mic" there, Weiner)

Da Mic Drop is a regular segment, where we look at people who make such a pointed "standing-ovation-worthy" commentary in regards to a person or issue that it has to be highlighted. 

This is just a quick summation of my thoughts on the Anthony Weiner "scandal" (basically a "E!" story that desperate columnist are trying to dress in political cosplay so they can utilize their "Trump University Relationship Counselor" degrees and tisk-tisk in self-aggrandizing affectations about personal issues that are not really any if their business.)

This is a stupid non-issue so it's fitting that I went to Twitter (the usual breeding ground for stupidity about non-issue) for reflection. However, a few people actually made some salient points about the appropriate responses to this story.

First there's Glenn Greenwald, a frequent critic of the media's hyperventilating salivation over sensationalism while ignoring substantial claims that actually affect the public (for instance, he offers a very meaningful reflection over the Ashley Madison leak a year ago. Check it out, it's a pretty thoughtful analysis):

This is revolting. A big reason people like to talk about sex scandals is they enable self-glorifying moralizing... https://twitter.com/robinmarty/status/770319229736226816
12:51 PM - 29 Aug 2016
Verified a 
And then, weighing in for a two-fer is Nerd God/Shark Jumper hybrid, Wil Wheton who (in the same Glenn Greenwald thread oddly enough, like who knew he was even a follower?) chewed on this tidbit:
@ggreenwald I feel like I missed something. Dad sends explicit text messages to another adult. How is that a dangerous situation for child?
12:59 PM - 29 Aug 2016

Also, because the only thing that turns our dull-witted on more on that breathless sweet nothings of sex scandal tabloid speculation is "Both Sides Do It" foreplay, here's Wil getting a jump on diffusing this little piece of logical fallacy:

Wil Wheaton

Wil Wheaton ‏@wilw
Trump: *hires racist to run campaign* Clinton: *aide is married to a dirtbag* Media: EQUIVALENT CONTROVERSY ON BOTH CAMPAIGN'S STAFF!

I also can't forget the wise words of this nation's most...let's say "appropriate" philosopher (from the fervent mind of someone who has done as much media criticism as Glenn Greenwald). So take it away,  America's brattiest six-year old (no, not Trump):


Of course this is about vaguely Beltway-adjacent people (he's a former congressman and his wife is working on Hilary Clinton's campaign) so the press can pretend that this is Different and Important,  but honestly, this piece of sensationalism has all the colossal relevance of finding out that omg! you guys, Hank Baskett totally cheated on that Kendra chick with that T-girl she is like so scandalized and we got to see every angst-plagued rendering of their mega-confrontation  (and if you're wondering what does that info has to do with anything going on, then you've already gotten the point.)

Oh and My grand take? As I said on another message board:

"Who cares?"
And even by "prurient interest" standards, this is a boring old rerun. Not enough investment for the the public at large to grab the Pearls of the Titillated Busybody for which they may clutch in Scandalized Outrage.

Sunday, August 14, 2016

Cynical Proverbs 8:14: Special Riverdale Edition

"All men are created equal"
"It's just that somen men are more equal than others" --Veronica Lodge ("And stop saying that I bastardized that quote from Animal Farm. My servants doing research assured me that it was an original idea I came up with all on my own! Besides it's so hard the think up sayings when you have to worry about whether Archie asked that bitch Betty out on the same day as you like he did 5,000 other times. Let's see George Orwell deal with important issues like that! And where the hell is the chauffeur with my Lamborghini...")

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

A Very Special Episode of 2+2=7...

In which Stephanie Tanner learns all about meth...the hard way.

Seriously the PSA is all about my "favorite" subject: Police brutality. See what with those nifty newfangled recording thingamabobs (I think the kids call them "cameras") cops are having a sad because their misdeeds and abuses are being captured and exposed for the public to see. Not to worry though because North Carolina governor Pat Mccrory, tired of worrying about transgender people taking a piss has decided on new people to fuck over by signing some POS law that would block police video and body cams from being released to the public. As I pointed out in the link above:


Recent history has shown time and again that law enforcement needs transparancy of cameras and scrutiny of the public (who remeber, they are suppose to be SERVING.)

You only need to Google one of the 50,000 police shootings and brutalities to see an example of the above (plus ANY goverment agency given any kind of authoritative power needs transpanacy from the public to emphasize that they SERVE us not RULE OVER us.) Fortunatly, there's something you can do to help. Go to the Change.org website in the handy little hyperlink sign the petition telling the NC Legislator that we the people will not stand for actions the shield the public from potential abuses from law enforcement. Also spread the word about this and/or donate to the cause if you can. Thank you.

So join us in the next very special episode where Laura Winslow learns An Important Lesson about underage drinking  (mainly that it will help tolerate the annoying meme-generating camera-mugging of Steve Urkel.





Saturday, July 30, 2016

Cynical Sincere Proverbs 7:30

These are words of wisdom that I once bestowed about yet another fool whining about how he's losing some of the privilege of having his belligerent  ignorance pandered to the "elitists" look down on him because they won't tolerate his intolerance:

"When you insist on lying in the gutter, where else can one look but down. Now if you really want, I can help you up; even rinse you off (unless you're covered in fecal matter, then, brother, you better wait until I get the decontamination suit and more scented candles than a Pier One warehouse), but for Pete's sake, don't pull me down with you just your stank ass can meet someone eye-to-eye."