Saturday, June 6, 2015

Jesus forgave me so it's OK.

One of the few good things about pop culture osmosis is that post like this can talk about certain attributes of society without rehashing everything. Therefore most of you are probably aware that America's favorite TV-friendly cult/family/breeding factory, the Duggar's got in a bit of trouble recently since In Touch Weekly decided to do something resembling actual investigative reporting and revealed that eldest son, Josh Duggar is a gross incestuous kid molesting perv.  And while the In Touch Weekly link is usually a sign for the skepticism button to by pressed hard, the family has since confessed that this molestation happened and In Touch Weekly was even thoughtful enough to provide a police report. We know these acts are bad because Papa Duggar has expressed it in a campaign speech and Mama Duggar terrorized an Arkansas neighborhood with robo-calls warning about how anti-discrimination laws will lead the transgendered community preying on your children in public restrooms (I know, it's as if irony and hypocrisy had a really stupid baby.) We also know it's bad because Josh Duggar has legally "gotten away with it" thanks a cover-up involving child-porn watching cops, faux "counseling" sessions and a statue of limitation laws.

Actually, maybe "we" don't know that this is bad, because while you would think that child molestation would be the one action that everyone would unite everyone onto agreement as a disgusting, repulsive moral event horizon (particularly when the perpetrator confesses to the crime), The Duggar's have had a surprising number of defenders, including some rather prominent allies, offering up some unholy litany of the most asinine rationalizations and whitewashing to defend what should be the indefensible.

There are many, many ways to examine the excuses and deflections that The Duggar's and their followers have offered to downplay incestuous child molestation and the attempted cover-up thereof. One particular obnoxious attempt at minimizing that the Duggars have offered ad nauseam is the idea that Josh has since been "forgiven" by Jesus and we can therefore sweep the rampant criminality and hypocrisy of his acts under the rug with no need of further repercussions. Even if you haven't paid close attention to politics, you can probably note that this is the go-to PR move whenever a political figure is caught with their hand in someone else's cookie jar, so to speak, particularly if they are running on a "traditional values" platform. This deftly allows the the discussion to be framed in terms of religiosity (which apparently bypasses any legal or ethical concerns about who or what they violated rendering the offended party as "not important") with emphasis on declaring the matter "resolved" and less on how to fix what their actions broke. Furthermore this religious framework de-emphasizes the severity of the action by taking a "all crimes are equal" approach that's just ridiculous when applied to real-world rational thinking. As I put it in my response to this Wonkette article :

This, incidentally, is one of my problems with Christianity (or at least as it's practiced here): all "sins" (as oppose to "crimes, which this also qualifies) have to be classified as equal with no filters, so say, wearing your skirt too high ("I saw a whole ankle!") or "believing" in the THEORY of evolution is just as much an affront to Jesus as, say repeatedly molesting underaged family members. In addition they are all required to be "resolved" the same way ("take two prayers with a cup of sanctimony and call me in the morning.")
See by categorizing such acts as mere "sins" (again, as oppose to "crime") Josh Duggar's depravity can be reduced to a mere "indiscretion" or moral "oopsie" that only needs to be resolved by concerned Christians praying it away with the same moral fervor as if one of the Duggar girls wore a tankini or something.

Update: Just to let you know that for once, TLC network execs decided to preserve their economic bottom line sense of decency (Ha! Just kidding. They traded that for Pogs a long time ago) and finally, finally CANCELLED the wretched show. Hopefully TLC will realize from this fiasco about the perils of exploiting trashy idiots for short-term profit before one of the Duck Dynasty fools get caught strangling hookers or something. Who knows, maybe then The Learning Channel might actually start living up to its name again.

Update 2: The Heretic:  Looks like Josh Duggar has been asking himself that all-important religious question: Who would Jesus do? The answers turns out to be: someone other than his wife, as Joshie-boy decided to move on to being a gross perv to adult women by being one of the profiles linked to the Ashley Madison website hack. You know, judging by the rate the scandals are adding up, I suspect the "skeletons in his closet" are going to contain actual skeletons.

But boy those degenerate homosexuals have sure ruined the sanctity of marriage haven't they?

Update 3: Rise of the Machines: Just informing all the fellow atheist that we were wrong! Satan does exist and he sold off Hell to run an even darker dimension: the TLC network! (yeah as if y'all didn't know that already). Yes, Tv Beelzebub demanded spin-offs of 19 Sexual Violations and Counting. Ugh! Maybe the new episodes will feature a special guest appearance by attention-whore-in-the-making, Kim Davis where they discuss how God has "washed them clean"...of decency.


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. First if all, thank you for replying and visiting the dank cobweb-infected little corner er of the Internet I set up shop in.

      And yeah, the weird thing about this country is that saying "I don't go to church" can often get you the same reaction you'd get if you confessed that you "Duggared" someone. Sheesh.